The Loop

When I don't have time to take Pasta to a park or a local trail, I walk her through our neighborhood. We walk to the top of our street, then back down by way of a trail, which brings us out on the main road, and back down to our street.

I call it The Loop. (I know....genius, right?!)

See that red arrow? I stood right where it is and took this photo of our street:

It may not look like much, but this hill kicks....my....butt. By the time we get to the top of it, I have to stop and catch my breath. The other night, while walking Pasta, something occurred to me. This little 10-minute wallk we take is a perfect opportunity for some low-intensity intervial training. If I walk it several times, it provides a good cardio workout with varying levels of intensity. I work hard getting up the hill, and then I catch my breath coming down the trail, and then I do it again. After walking The Loop three or four times, I've worked up a little bit of a sweat, I've gotten between 30 and 40 minutes of cardio work in, and I have a happy dog, because she got to go for a walk. :)

Not gonna lie....when I can get to the top of my street without gasping for air or having to stop to catch my breath, I will do a little victory dance.

Measuring Progress

Last Sunday, I was over at my friend Randi's house visiting.

I don't own a scale, and I don't plan to buy one -- I'll tell you why in a minute -- but Randi DOES own a scale, so I decided to see what my starting weight was while I was at her house.

239.4 pounds.

Monday (June 25th) was the start of Week Three.  Since I didn't meet my exercise goals for Week Two, my goals for Week Three stayed the same:

• Keep eating reasonable amounts of healthy foods.
• Keep drinking plenty of water.
• Try to get in at least an hour of cardio every other day.

Randi and I talked about my goals for Week Three, and we decided that every Sunday, we would get together at her house, and I would have a weeky weigh-in.  I love friends who help keep me accountable!!  :)

Week Three went really well.  In addition to keeping my food portions reasonable and healthy, I worked out six days!!  Some days it was an hour of step aerobics before work, other days it was a walk with Pasta.  One of the days, I actually did both!!  Crazy, right?!?!

On Wednesday, I asked my chiropractor to check my blood pressure after my adjustment.  Just two months ago, my doctor put me on medication because my blood pressure was 190/110....but when my chiropractor checked it on Wednesday, it was 119/81!!  I know, right?!?!  So awesome!!

So, Sunday rolled around, and I headed over to Randi's house for my weekly weigh-in.....

....wait for it.....

....wait for it....

234.6 pounds.

Down 4.8 pounds in one week.

We celebrated with fresh sliced strawberries, fresh raspberries and a little bit of whipped cream.  :)


When I tell people that I just recently started a healthy diet and exercise program, the first question most of them ask is, "How much weight have you lost?" or "What is your goal weight?"

As a society, I think we are WAY too focused on what our weight says about us.  Don't get me wrong....I want to lose weight. I weigh 100 pounds more than what is considered a "healthy" weight for a woman my age and my height.  I know that obesity causes all kinds of health problems.  Obviously, I know that I need to lose weight.  And with the changes I'm making, I am going to lose weight.  I'll weigh in every Sunday and track my progress because it's part of the equation, but I refuse to measure my success by the number on the scale. I know a lot of people who are at a healthy weight, and are extremely unhealthy.  What you weigh doesn't mean squat if you're not fit.

I'd be totall lying if I said I wasn't stoked about my 4.8-pound loss.  But if all I'm paying attention to is the number on the scale, I'll get disouraged the first week I don't lose weight, or the first week I gain a pound.  I'm a perfectionist!! I need to see results!!

That's why I won't be buying a scale....if I have a scale, I'll be getting on it every day and I'll get all caught up on how much I'm losing.  Instead, I plan to measure my success on how I feel, how my body changes and responds to exercise, how my clothes fit.

The journey isn't just about losing weight.  It's about getting strong and healthy.  Remembering that will help keep me motivated.

Setting Realistic Goals

I'm a perfectionist.  When I decide to do something, I put my entire heart and soul into it.  But if I don't do whatever it is I have set out to do perfectly, I feel like I've failed, I get discouraged, and I stop trying.

This is the approach I have always taken with eating healthy and exercising.  I decide I'm going to start eating better, and that I'm going to exercise every single day.  And it usually lasts a day or two, and then I have a late night and I sleep in, not giving myself enough time to exercise, or I grab fast food for dinner and I feel sluggish the next day.  And I think, Well, I tried...and I failed....clearly, I am destined to be fat and unfit for the rest of my life.

In addition to being a perfectionist, I'm not a very patient person.  I like to see immediate results when I take on a project.  I have this insane notion in my mind that as soon as I work out, I'm going to feel amazing, and I won't get winded climbing stairs any more, and my joints will stop hurting. It's ridiculous how I have repeatedly set myself up for failure.

Three weeks ago, when I decided to start eating healthier and exercising regularly, I found myself falling into the same self-defeating patterns and thoughts.  I felt determined to give it my all, and at the same time, in the back of my mind, I felt destined to fail.

I made a decision to work on tackling one thing at a time.  I told myself that by taking a different apporach than what I've taken in the past, I would be less likely to become overwhelmed, and therefore less likely to crash and burn two or three days in. My goals for Week One were to drink less soda, drink more water, and eat breakfast every day.  That was it.  Over and over, I reminded myself:  You don't have to do it all at once.  Go slow.  Concentrate on the healthy changes you're making, and on what you're accomplishing.  Don't think about the things you are not doing.  You'll get there.

I focused on making healthier food choices and controlling my portion sizes.  I didn't worry about exercise....my mindset was, If I feel like exercising, then I'll exercise.  If I don't feel like exercising, then I'll sit on the couch and watch television.  Focus on food.  Just food.And the craziest thing happened.  I met all of my goals for Week One.  I didn't just cut back on soda....I quit drinking it altogether.  I ate a healthy breakfast every morning.  Instead of fast food for lunch, I ate slices of turkey breast, grapes, and yogurt.  For dinner, I chose healthy, low-fat meals.  And even though I wasn't focused on exercising, I managed to do a couple of cardio workouts and an hour of strength training, and I took Pasta for a quick walk every night after work.

For Week Two, my goal was to add an hour of cardio every other day.

Then my sister called me and told me that she was coming to visit for a few days.  I was so excited to see her, but also really worried that the unexpected visit would cause me to lose focus.  I got all stressed out about how I was going to work and meet my goals for the week and get my house ready for company.  And my awesome friends stepped in and helped me think more rationally and realistically.  They reminded me that housework counts as exercise, and that even if I didn't exercise for a few days, it was not the end of the world, and that everything would be okay.  They told me to do my best and enjoy the time with my Seester.

My friends were my voice of reason.

I'm not gonna lie....spending time with my family was more important to me than exercising, because I probably won't see my sister again for almost a year.

So, yeah....I didn't meet my goals for Week Two.  But instead of seeing it as a failure and getting discouraged, I saw it as an opportunity to re-focus and try even harder.

It feels strange to be setting smaller, more realistic goals for myself, instead of coming out of the gate at full speed and burning out. And it is completely out of character for me to tell myself that it's okay if I don't meet my weekly goals or do everything perfectly.  But it's been such an awesome experience to step outside of my comfort zone and change the way I think about my goals.

Inspiration = Motivation

I've struggled with depression for years.

I've struggled with my weight for years.

Coincidence?  I think not.

It's easy to get fat when you're depressed.  I have spent entire days in bed, getting up only to eat.  It's a vicious cycle....the more depressed I am, the less motivated I feel to do anything about it....this causes me to feel like a failure, and I turn to food for comfort....I become more depressed, and feel even less motivated....you can see where this is going.

I often feel generally unhappy or unsatisfied with my life. I'm disappointed that I haven't accomplished the things I wanted to accomplish. I question my purpose. In my darkest moments, I have felt like there's no point in trying at all, and wished for a quick exit from this life.

It is in those moments that I turn to the people and things that inspire me.  In doing so, I am able to step outside of myself and see the bigger picture.  I am reminded that there is always hope, and that it is never too late to change your life for the better. Inspiration leads to motivation, and motivation leads to change.

Here are just a few of the things that inspire me....

My Seester

Oh, how I love this woman!!  She is the one person in my life who has always been there for me.  She is my best friend, my therapist, my confidant, my cheerleader, my teacher, my life preserver.  She knows me better than I know myself, and always knows exactly what to say to talk me down off of the emotional ledges I often find myself on.  She believes in me more that I believe in myself.  When I say, "I can't do it," she says, "That's bull crap!!  You can do anything you set your mind to."

We grew up in a pretty dysfunctional home.  I think our need for some sort of normalcy brought us together.  We've always been close.  I took her to her first concert.  She taught me how to do The Running Man.  I'm ten years older than her, and as children, she looked up to me.  Now, years later, I look up to her.  She is one of the strongest, smartest people I know.

I would love to be able to do something amazing with my Seester, like take a weekend hiking adventure to a place we've never been before or run a 5k. But that won't happen unless I stay focused on my fitness goals. She holds me accountable and inspires me to keep pushing forward.


Pasta

No, I'm not talking about noodles, although I do love Italian Food!!

Pasta is my dog.

I adopted her in February of 2005 from an animal shelter in Phoenix.  I was married at the time, and it was actually my husband who picked her out.  When we first brought her home, she was destructive and kept jumping the wall every time we put her in the back yard.  In the first two weeks we had her, I tried to take her back to the shelter three times.  The first time, they were closed.  The second time, they informed me that they only took animals on certain days and that I would have to come back the following week.  By the third visit, I couldn't even get out of the car.  She had grown on me, and giving her back was no longer an option.  Somehow, she must have known, because she didn't jump the wall again and all of our furniture stayed intact.

When I went through my divorce in the spring of 2010, I left Phoenix and moved back to Seattle to start over.  I lived with my brother for a few months, and his apartments didn't allow pets, so Pasta stayed in Phoenix with my ex-husband's parents.  Although I knew she was being well cared for, not having her with me was gut-wrenching.  My desire to get her to Seattle is what kept me going, and six months later, I had her back with me.

She is such a good dog.  I work two jobs, and sometimes I am gone for 12-14 hours a day.  But she never misbehaves, and she always greets me enthusiastically when I come home. Apartment living must be incredibly boring for her, and getting outside is the best part of her day.  She loves going for walks, but as a fat, unfit, depressed person, I haven't walked her nearly as much as I should.  There have been weeks where all she gets is a couple of quick potty breaks, and then it's back inside to lounge on the couch with me.

Even when I wasn't concerned about my health, I was concerned about hers. I want her with me for as long as possible, and I know that she will live a longer, healthier life if she gets regular exercise. I find myself saying, "I need to walk her more....it would be so good for her." But it's good for me too. :)

The Strength Of Others

I love seeing and hearing the success stories of other people who are trying to get healthy and change their lives. Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition is an amazing show that tells the stories of morbidly obese people and their remarkable transformations as they fight to overcome their fears and doubts and get healthy.  As I said in my introductory post, I was incredibly inspired by the story of Jacqui Mccoy.

Over the course of a year, Jacqui lost a record-breaking 207 pounds, proving that what seems impossible is possible when you find your fight.

Watching Jacqui's episode really resonated with me.  I listened to her talk about all of her fears and doubts and insecurities and I cried the ugly cry.  Seeing her transformation is what really sealed the deal for me and made me decide that I needed to stop making excuses and start getting serious about getting healthy.

She.  Is.  Amazing.

Jacqui Before & After

Nature Photography

I love taking pictures.  I have always been inspired by nature photography, and I have gotten some incredible photos of the world we live in.  But here's the thing....being 100 pounds overweight and incredibly out of shape really limits you as a nature photographer.  I live in one of the most scenic parts of the United States, and I'm not able to enjoy it the way I would like to because I am so out of shape.  I am limited to roadside viewpoints and the simplest of hikes.  I am inspired by the thought of the places I could see and the photos I could get if I could take a day hike and get to some of the places that offer beautiful sweeping views of the beauty of the Pacific Northwest.

Right now I am limited to this:

What  I really want is to see is this:

Photo by Jon Cornforth 

My Friends

Having a good support system is crucial to succeeding, and I have an amazing group of friends who support and encourage me every day.  Through emails, text messages, and comments on Facebook, my friends cheer me on and hold me accountable.  Having my friends tell me how proud they are of what I'm doing or how I am inspiring them is a huge motivator.  I'm so grateful for the support and encouragement I get from my friends, for the experiences they share, and for their belief in my ability to acheive whatever I set my mind to.

Staying focused on the people and things that inspire me helps to hold myself accountable, and motivates me to keep working towards my fitness goals.  I am excited to explore the new possibilities that await me as I move forward.